Fellman's Movie Reviews

Diamonds Are Forever is a good Bond film. I don’t think it’s one of the best. But it’s not one of the worst. It’s above average if anything else. You can tell that Sean Connery is playing Bond for the last time because he’s really putting the effort into the character this time. As opposed to Thunderball, where he was practically phoning it in. 

But it looks like he’s having fun again in this movie. It looks like James Bond is the secret agent that we knew before. Having drinks with supervillains, seducing women, and saving the world is just a day in the life for James Bond once again. 

The one thing I didn’t like about this movie is the David Crosby looking hitman and his partner, Mr. Wint and Mr. Kidd. I think as far as bad guys go, you want your bad guys to be intimidating or scary, not goofy. There’s nothing good about a goofy bad guy. Unless it’s like, a comedy or something. But James Bond isn’t a comedy. It’s a spy movie. We’ve been over this… 

Another thing I noticed was how horrible all of the drivers were in the 70s. The cars that were chasing Bond through the desert were just kind of driving down the road and then would veer off the side of the path and into an embankment and roll over or something. Or drive off a cliff that wasn’t even there a second ago. Like, where did that cliff come from? Is there a button on the dashboard that manually flips the car upside down? People can’t be that bad of drivers. I know James Bond is a better driver than you, but come on. 

And at the end of the movie, there’s really no reason for everything to start blowing up. It’s not like there’s anything flammable on that rig. It’s not an actual functional oil rig. It’s essentially just a big helipad. Everything just starts to blow up anyway. Which, Blofeld made the right choice and just got the hell out of there. Discretion is the better part of valor, after all. 

So, yeah. Go and see Diamonds Are Forever. It’s Sean Connery’s last dance as James Bond. I think it’s a pretty good story. And there’s a chase scene with a lunar rover. How many movies can offer you that? Not a whole lot. And as always, keep on watching, with a smile on your face…